knots

been a choppy phase the last some weeks...first, my kid and then the hubby got chickenpox...the former had a rather mild (tho still worrisome) episode, while the latter is still in the midst of the slump - nursing him back to health...we all lust for and dream of a break soon, in some wildlife resort or by the ocean or in some forgotten tucked away hill resort...ah.

being ill temporarily where one can do nothing but lie and contemplate the ceiling, changes one's perspective in life...I've had an event where I literally was only doing that for almost a month or so...not knowing if I could walk again and have a life I had...a freak incident that tested me and my family beyond the limits...have risen through it and cherish the experience as one that most of my peers wouldnt, and shouldnt, identify with.

life is like that...you bloody well have to be prepared for everything it throws at you. right in the middle of a dull plateau, boom, there's a vortex right below your feet that suck n drops you to the bottom of an abyss...somebody i know went through a similar experience...but the icky part was that it was somebody she called her partner, her life-companion who arranged for the sudden change in fortunes...shes a fighter and clawing her way back to a future full of hope.

another is stuck with a man whose idea of love is, in a word, sick...after years of abuse, and after she vented out her angst to a friend, she decides its not worth it...the stronger she gets, the more insecure, weaker, inferior he thinks he gets...and this is a very accomplished highly educated urban couple...she will hang on for the kid, but has resolved not to deny herself the right to live the way she wants to anymore...all living beings have the right to live the life they want to....tho its a cliche, freedom *is* everyone's birthright that some with their sick manipulative ways, deprive the ones they supposedly love or care for, of...that's not love, that's self-love and being a control-freak.